As I was getting ready this morning, a note taped to the bathroom mirror caught my eye. It was a list of my weights starting in January 2014. It hit me that today is July 29th. Then a second thought hit me that this week is a two year anniversary, too.
Wow. This week is full of transformation anniversaries.
Two years ago we were on a family vacation with friends at the beach. I was having all kinds of health issues including severe joint pain in my elbows, digestive issues and hot flashes. Not fun in 90+ degree weather. Our vacation home had a pool which as great for the kids. All they wanted to do was swim. Not good for me; hot, hurting and down right feeling like a big fat whale. I only put on a bathing suit once because I was so ashamed of my weight. I was 220 pounds, a size 22 and miserable. Many people will say I should have gotten over that and enjoyed myself, my family and friends while on vacation. That didn't happen. I wallowed in my misery and felt worse and worse about myself.
I was at my wits end and had to do something. I felt awful mentally and physically. One of the days I asked my friends about their trainer just to start gathering information. I contacted him when I got home. I started working out with him twice a week after work. Then it went to four days after work. Then I added boot camp on Saturdays. My diet changed. I controlled food portions and my daily caloric intake. My body began to change. The health issues went away (also after changing some medications) and the back pain I had for years was gone because my core was stronger. In a year my weight dropped to 167 pounds and I was a size 12 again. I was healthier than I had been in years and felt good.
But I had a second goal. My daughter was born by c-section. After losing 50+ pounds there was a lot of extra skin around my abdomen. No amount of crunches or sit-ups helped. I decided it was time for transformation number two. I scheduled a consultation with a plastic surgeon for abdominoplasty, liposuction and breast augmentation. On July 29, 2014 I had the procedures and my life changed again.
I have strong opinions on plastic surgery. First, abdominoplasty is not an easy surgery.
IT HURTS!!! Don't let any one tell you otherwise. Recovery from a c-section and child birth was a breeze compared to a tummy tuck. It was the worst pain, EVER! It was awful. I begged Mr. O for pain meds every three hours. (He recalls the time as the "two weeks from hell.") I refused to get out of bed the first week and caught pneumonia. Coughing up a lung when your abdomen is recovering from major surgery is not fun! But two weeks later my pain disappeared.
Second, liposuction causes bruising. Mr. O commented that it looked like someone beat me with a baseball bat. I refused to look. Besides I couldn't straighten up or turn myself to see it anyway. That was probably a good thing. But that was a normal reaction and the bruising went away with time.
Third, the breast augmentation was a cake walk. It was an easy recovery and my swelling was gone in less than two weeks. It took awhile to adjust to a bigger size, but overall it was not a big deal as compared to the tummy tuck.
So here I am a year-to-the-day post surgery. I am still the same weight from a year ago, but a size 8. I am still with my trainer; two years this week! My goal last year was to either tone up and maintain the same weight or maybe lose a little more. However, my body decided this is my ideal weight. Screw the BMI telling me I should be 155 pounds. I can live with this. I am healthy. I am happy (most days). I can still get in the clothes I bought last year. Mr. O is happy that I am healthier and pleased with my goal accomplishments. My child sees a healthier mom who is comfortable with herself.
I am sure some will criticize me for getting plastic surgery. People will say I should have been happy just the way I was, I should have loved myself more, I should have worked out harder or that I wasted money on something frivolous. I don't care. This was a personal decision I made with my husband and the advice of a doctor. Plastic surgery is not for everyone. It was the right choice for me. As my doctor said, I did it the right way by losing the weight first in a healthy manner and changing my eating habits. The surgery was a reward for the hard work.
Having said all that, there are days I don't feel good about myself. I still see myself as 50 pounds heavier. I avoid taking pictures because I see the "big girl." I changed clothes three times yesterday because the dresses I tried on showed some lumps and bumps. I get down on myself that I am not the 125 pounds skinny college student I was in 1990. (Well, duh! It's called aging and having a baby!) I see women my age on TV and the Internet all toned and super skinny which causes me to whine "why can't that be me?" I bash myself for eating those chocolate caramel candies last night or drinking a beer or wine with dinner.
Then I remind myself that I feel better physically and mentally than I have in 10 years. I have increased my life span (hopefully) with these choices so I have more time on this earth with my husband and child. My healthy habits set a good example for my daughter and help her make better decisions that will impact the rest of her life. My relationship with Mr. O is at its strongest point in our 21 years together. All this occurred because I set goals and worked to achieve them.
So happy transformation anniversaries week. I wonder what the next year will bring.
